I moved from the US to Italy almost 25 years ago. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve crossed the ocean, although I can tell you it has always been by air and never by sea. In that time I’ve lost touch with some friends and colleagues and made new ones along the way. With a close few, however, we’ve made an effort to keep our ties strong. With some friends that means a scheduled weekly or monthly call, with others it means meeting when I’m in town and picking up where we left off, even if a year or two or more have passed.
The tie remains strong because of our intention to make it so.
In the past few years as I’ve become intentional about growing my business, I’ve developed and nurtured ties with colleagues and peers who are book coaches, most of whom I’ve met through Author Accelerator, where I received my book coach certification. We schedule monthly or quarterly calls to discuss our goals, our plans, and our practices. I have three group calls, two 1:1 calls, even a WhatsApp group. These encounters—call them masterminds if you must—have had an ongoing positive influence on my personal and professional growth. This newsletter became a regular habit after doing Amy Porterfield’s List Builder Society with a group of book coaches.
For those of us who work remotely, creating intentional meetings with like-minded people is a priceless and necessary part of professional progress. We risk making the same mistakes, stagnating, or wallowing in self-doubt (or its evil twin self-aggrandizement) if we stay alone talking to the mirror. These meetings aren’t about competition; they provide support. We’re genuinely interested in each other’s challenges and successes.
Here, intention meets accountability.
You probably know some version of the quote about becoming like the people you spend the most time with. My business changed when I started spending more time with people who were doing the kind of work I do and were a few steps ahead of me—children aren’t the only ones who learn the most from examples. I had to replace anyone who complained about a lack of time, energy, or resources with those who are doing the work of making things happen.
Call this intention plus accountability to the nth power of inspiration.
I’m not saying anything new about how to develop new and better habits or how to become a better human. The formula of the group dynamic applies to most of the things we do. People who want to create a fitness habit find a walking or running buddy. Students who want to improve their grades form a study group. You can do the same with your writing habit.
If you want to write a book, one of the best things you can do is to find a writing buddy or a small writing group (you could even hire a book coach). You don’t have to join a critique group. You don’t need to share your writing, unless you want that kind of group. Your buddy or small group inspires you, makes you accountable to show up to do the work, to draw a line in the sand, put a stake in the ground. Pick the metaphor that suits you but know that you don’t have to write alone.
When I first moved to Rome, I found a writing group through the US Embassy and the American Women’s Association in Rome. To find a writing buddy, start looking where writers hang out: check the bulletin board at your local library, ask your local bookstore, or join online writing groups. As you get to know other writers, ask a few if they’d like to form a group. If you are looking for a critique partner, you can sign up for Julie Artz’s Critique Partner Meet Cute until June 1, 2023.